Rock And Roll Child

Now, where did I leave off?

I had a talk to Kate, since things have been uber shit lately. She's been an brat lately. It pissed me off. So I explained what was annoying me. I thought it would get better, but it's gotten worse.

From where I stand, Kate wants something other than what I can offer her. I want something other than what she can offer.

For me, everything comes down to sex and pain in the end. I can't live without either of those two things. I am Id: pleasure-pain, instinct, impulse.

If I was to continue to be with Kate, then I would have to repress a significant amount of my Id. But, if you take the sex and pain away, I am nothing more than an empty shell. And my Id can not be repressed for long... it will fight, until it escapes.

Haha yeah, I'm still here. Haven't died. Yet. God I hate my life.
Probably failed at least two of my subjects.
Sister is a delinquent, has been in trouble with cops, etc.
Brother is cadbury.
Dad has drinking problem.
Mother is nuts.
Sick of the girlfriend.
Get me out of here.

I am unable to post this to my usual blog, as a certain person has access to that.

So I am back here, for the time being. A lot has changed in the last 20 weeks (which is when I last updated). I have been exploring BDSM, both online and in real-time. I have learnt a lot so far.

I have a girlfriend/submissive, whom I met at uni. I collared her two weeks ago.

However, I think that may have not been the best idea. I want more than she can offer me. I want more than just a bedroom subbie. I want so, so, so much more. But she's a really nice girl, and I really like her. I'm hoping this is just temporary, and it'll all blow over. But part of me wants to go searching elsewhere.

Only a grandmother would help you get out of debt and NOT lecture you. Only a grandmother would promise NOT to tell your mother. And only a grandmother could manage to make you happy at the same time.